CREDO
October 17, 2021
Don Rogers
The first thing I did when asked to give my Credo was to go back and find the one I gave two years ago, before the Covid pandemic.
If your memory is no better than mine, I could have reread the same one, and probably no one would have noticed. But I noticed that I missed a lot of pertinent parts of my life and my credo.
I made no mention of my wife and her years of dementia and death in July of 2018. It was too close to mention at that time, and I might have not been able to say the words aloud without tears. It’s still hard.
Very briefly, I was raised Seventh-day Adventist, and educated in church schools through one year of college, at Walla Walla University, in the state of Washington.
I left that religion when I was eighteen, and studied many others, trying to find the true church. I studied the Branch Davidians, Jehovah’s Witness, the Mormon church, Armstrong’s Worldwide Church of God, and others.
I still retain a strong interest in Biblical history, especially the first four hundred years of the Christian church. I read extensively and write a blog online about some of my findings now and then.
This is in spite of my study of Buddhism, which is the basis of my beliefs and ethics now. I studied with Buddhist priests at a temple in Naha, Okinawa, along with a couple of Christian buddies of mine in the US Army with me.
My wife Carolyn and I enjoyed a very happy marriage for 49 years together, living in several states, including California, Colorado, Nevada, and lastly, Oklahoma, where she was born and raised.
From the first year we were together, we made square dancing our social outlet, and danced at national festivals in Anaheim, CA, Portland, OR, and Oklahoma City twice. Even as Alzheimer’s took away her memory, she still loved to dance, and when Featherstone Assisted Care Home had special musical performers put on shows for the residents, we danced the night away. Her feet never forgot.
We also loved the outdoors and nature, camping in the forest campgrounds, and hiking mountain trails in Yosemite and the Sequoia big trees in Calaveras county, CA.
We moved to Nevada in 1981, and soon found that the towns were about 70-80 miles apart. Travel took forever, even though the highways were free and fast. Carolyn urged me to go and get my pilot’s license, which she knew was a dream of mine, so I took lessons and got my license in 1985.
We flew from Winnemucca, Nevada, to Durant, Oklahoma, many times in the next few years for her family reunions, seeing some spectacular sights as we flew cross country. Monument Valley in Utah especially stands out as awe inspiring from the air.
We also flew back from a symphonic concert in Elko, NV, one December morning at about 1:00 AM and found ourselves in a meteor shower. At 10,000 feet altitude there are a lot more meteors visible, and they were all coming from behind us and passing by our wings on both sides. All we could do was watch in silence and wonder.
Much of our life was lived by the Buddhist principle of impermanence. Nothing lasts forever, and everything changes. If we wanted to do something, to enjoy living, to not miss out on an experience, it was important to do it now, or as soon as possible. Tomorrow is not promised, and life must be lived in the present.
I believe a successful life must be an active life, becoming involved in the lives of those around us, including family, society, and even politics. I was a founding member of the Libertarian party, although I left that party later.
I became heavily involved in the Democratic Party of Nevada during Barack Obama’s run at the Presidency in 2008. I was elected Chairman of the Democratic Party in Humboldt County and assisted in the first caucuses in that state, helping elect Obama in Nevada. Since that time I have volunteered to work at polling places during elections, six times in Nevada, and four elections since I moved to Oklahoma. I was an Inspector for Precinct 27 last Tuesday for the Bryan County sales tax vote.
While my wife was declining with Alzheimer’s I wrote constantly. I have been a writer since I was young, and it provides a way to unload worries and sorrows from my mind during the day so I can sleep at night.
Our daughter Darlene moved up to Oklahoma to help me take care of her mother during the two years she lived at Featherstone Assisted Care Home. We were there everyday to bring her ice cream and candy, take her on outings to Lake Texoma or the city park on Washington St. in Durant. We walked with her when she got restless and walked the halls of the building, and as she became paralyzed we pushed her around in the wheelchair. We fed her as she became too weak to feed herself. We both held her hands as she died.
Since this Covid pandemic left me stuck at the house for much of last year, I have been able to assemble the myriad of blog posts, Facebook posts, and other notes I had written into a manuscript - a compilation, actually. I could not do it when the pain of losing her was fresh in my mind.
Since our life was spent making memories for each other, it was a cruel blow to find that she was losing those memories. I titled the book “The Memories are All Mine Now.” I tried to find a publisher, but got scammed by some shady outfit that just wanted my money. So I bought a good printer and self published it for close friends and relatives.
I have found a home in this Unitarian Universalist church, and appreciate the love, community, and nonjudgemental attitude about my Buddhist ways. My work with the Audio/Video team has been challenging but rewarding. I just keep learning more every week. When I die, I’ll be an A/V expert!
I’ll finish with a quote from the Tibetan leader, the Dalai Lama, “Whether you believe in God or not does not matter so much, whether you believe in Buddha or not does not matter so much: as a Buddhist, whether you believe in reincarnation or not does not matter so much.
You must lead a good life. And a good life does not mean just good food, good clothes, good shelter. These are not sufficient.
A good motivation is what is needed: compassion, without dogmatism, without complicated philosophy: Just understanding that others are human brothers and sisters and respecting their rights and human dignity.”
< Short speech given at the Red River Unitarian Universalist Church on Oct. 17, 2021 >
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